Agent P: Team P

Young Thruster is off to work for his dad, a wheezy old-school client of GBH, who owns a chain of exhaust centres. Leaving do tonight in Gordon Ramsay’s Heddon Street Kitchen near Piccadilly circus.

I tipped Thruster the wink five weeks ago, after my Friend Upstairs gave me a peek at the downgraded Q4 trading forecast for GBH UK and said “not a word to HR, but try and persuade those you could do without to jump now, rather than be pushed later”. Thruster is a good lad, if a bit of a duffer, so saves him from ignominy. He is already boasting about going ‘client side’ – tending to dad’s 35 rickety sheds.

There had been an uptick in tin-rattling leaving collections since mid-September. I’m clearly not the only one tipping winks. But the jump period is closing. Last week CBRE said it wanted to slash $300m from the payroll. Our ‘push’ is clearly coming.

What are the odds for Team P? Posh Boy and Posh Girl will survive – well connected and good at their jobs. Sporty Girl? Safe – Stakhanovite and big fee-earner. Geek Lad? Cheap, can stay. Charlie Boy? Poached from Savills in 2020 aged 54. Take a guess. Me? I have a Friend Upstairs. I hope.